Depicting Grief in Art: Edvard Munch

Norwegian expressionist painter Edvard Munch (1863-1944) is best known for his iconic work "The Scream", but for those of us who are struggling with grief, there's another one of his works that deserves mention: "Death in the Sickroom", painted sometime around 1896.  Munch's inspiration for the painting was traced back to his sister Sophie, who died from tuberculosis in 1877 at the age of 15.

Munch was known to have struggled with depression and anxiety throughout his life.  His depiction shows us that grief can be both a collective and, simultaneously, a profoundly individual, and even isolating experience.

Poetry in Grief: Emily Dickinson

American poet Emily Dickinson (1830-1886) wrote almost 1800 poems over the course of her earthly life.  One that I find particularly appropriate in relation to dying and grief is one she wrote in 1860, supposedly for her younger cousins, Louise and Frances, in an effort to comfort them upon the death of their mother.  Her cousins were only 18 and 12 years old at the time.

"Mama Never Forgets Her Birds" by Emily Dickinson

Mama never forgets her birds,
Though in another tree —
She looks down just as often
And just as tenderly
As when her little mortal nest
With cunning care she wove —
If either of her sparrows fall,
She notices, above.

Words of Comfort: from Reddit

 I spend a fair amount of time on Reddit.  While there's plenty there that can be depressing or discouraging, there's also a lot that can be helpful, educational, and/or inspiring, even for those of us who are trying to navigate our way through grief and loss.  The original poster on this one particular thread, which unfortunately was recently deleted, was lamenting about how losing a close relative was so difficult, because each day that passed meant that the time when she last saw her now-deceased loved one was getting farther and farther away. User ditka529 commiserated with her:

"This resonates with me. One part of me is proud of myself for making it through nine months, and the other part is sad that the gap between the last time I saw my dad just gets bigger.  I’m so sorry that you’re hurting."

And then user Kaykay987643 came up with this beautiful response:

"I don't know if this will help (and i guess it kind of depends on your belief system), but a lady in my grief group looks at it a different way. That every day that passes is one day closer to being with them again. I find this quite comforting."

Articles Worth Reading: 64 Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me About Grief

Over on the website What's Your Grief, Litsa Williams wrote an excellent article: 64 Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me About Grief.  Some of these have been especially relevant to me in recent months, including:

5. A hospital death is not always a bad death.

6. A home death/hospice death is not always a good death.

17. There is no timeline for grieving.  You can’t rush it.  You will grieve, in some form, forever.

18. “There will always be regrets.  No matter how much time you had, you’ll always want more”.

25. Grief can make you question your life, your purpose, and your goals.  And that isn’t always a bad thing.

49. “Just because you feel pretty good one day it doesn’t mean you are cured of your grief”.

58. “You don’t get over it, you just get used to it”.

63. You will never go back to being your “old self”.  Grief changes you and you are never the same.

The whole list is definitely worth a read.  Maybe there are others that apply to your own situation, dear reader, as you struggle with grief and loss.