Practices That Have Helped: Listening to Podcasts

It's no secret: grief can be a very isolating event.  It's actually kind of ironic: for something that is almost universally experienced, losing our loved ones can create all kinds of barriers with other people.  Friends who were once close to us might become more distant.  And we might be self-conscious about burdening other people with our sadness and turbulent emotions over our loss (or losses).  Many times we might find ourselves alone, wanting to talk with someone, but not sure who.  We might agonize over what we should say, and worry about how our words will be met.  We yearn to feel understood.

One practice that has really helped me in the last couple months has been listening to podcasts.  For me, it almost functions as a sort of "group therapy" when I don't have access to other people that I can share my experiences with.  Hearing others describe their losses, and the trials and sorrows they've endured, and how they've managed to pull through in spite of it all, has given me the strength to keep facing day-to-day life.  

There are two podcasts I have been listening to a lot as of late.  First is "Grief 2 Growth", hosted by Brian D. Smith.

 

 

Brian knows about the shock we can face from losing a loved one: his 15 year-old daughter Shayna died unexpectedly in 2015, and at that point he felt his life was over.  The tagline at the beginning of his podcast is that he was "planted, not buried" -- and his goal is to help listeners realize that they can still grow, thrive, and touch others' lives in spite of their grief.

The other podcast I've been listening to is hosted by Sandra Champlain, We Don't Die.

Sandra was a lifelong skeptic, until her fear of dying led her to conduct her own research, which led her to conclude that we, in fact, don't die at the end of our earthly lives.

Both Brian and Sandra have a wide variety of wonderful guests on their programs: people who have suffered the devastating loss of loved ones, people who have experienced profound After Death Communications and Near Death Experiences, people who are spiritual mediums, as well as people who have written books to help us deal with our grief.

I am sure there are many other podcasts out there that would be very beneficial for those of you who are grieving, and I hope to add to this list as I continue to explore.  In the meantime, if you are feeling lonely during this time of loss, I highly recommend checking out Brian's and Sandra's podcasts.  I have found much comfort by listening to them and the people they interview.

On Vacation....

It's been a month since I posted anything.  The primary reason is that on this day, right now, I have been taking an extended road trip with my dad.  It has been incredibly enjoyable and eye-opening, but at the same time, it has left me with little time and energy for regular updates to this site.  Look for more posts later on this month.  I feel like there's still a lot more to discuss!

In the meantime, have a look at this wonderful article from Emma Sparks at Lonelyplanet.com: "How Travels Helps Me Cope With Grief."  Emma lost her father at age 17 in an accident, and she explains how traveling regularly has helped strengthen her and given her more self-confidence.  One of my favorites quotes comes near the end of her article, which I found both funny and inspirational at the same time:

"You can’t live every day like it’s your last – if I did I’d be broke, exhausted, and probably in prison – but you can do what makes you truly happy as often as possible. In fact, I feel a duty to do so."

Articles Worth Reading: "You're Not Suffering One Loss, You're Suffering Many"

I just discovered this interesting article over at the Vitas Healthcare website: "You're Not Suffering One Loss, You're Suffering Many".  When we really think about it, there are actually multiple losses we suffer when we experience the death of a loved one.  The article lists over 20 ways we can feel loss.  Some of the more relevant, in my own personal case, include a loss of self-confidence, a loss of known family structure, loss of direction, and a loss of ability to see choices.  Do I feel like this all the time?  No, for me a lot of these feelings ebb and flow from day to day, or even throughout the day.  It's definitely worth a few minutes to read and go through the entire list -- the article does a really good job of clarifying a lot of the feelings and emotions people struggle with while they're grieving.

Words of Comfort: the Apostle Paul

I recently re-discovered these words from St. Paul the Apostle (circa 5 - circa 65 AD/CE), in his letter to the church in Corinth (located in modern-day Greece), written sometime around 55 AD/CE.  The passage is from 2nd Corinthians, chapter 5, verses 1 through 10. It is taken from the New Living Translation of the Holy Bible.  I have found that the Apostle Paul has the rare gift of getting us to look beyond our present difficult circumstances and have us take the longer view:

"For we know that when this earthly tent we live in is taken down (that is, when we die and leave this earthly body), we will have a house in heaven, an eternal body made for us by God himself and not by human hands. ² We grow weary in our present bodies, and we long to put on our heavenly bodies like new clothing. ³ For we will put on heavenly bodies; we will not be spirits without bodies.^{[a] 4} While we live in these earthly bodies, we groan and sigh, but it’s not that we want to die and get rid of these bodies that clothe us. Rather, we want to put on our new bodies so that these dying bodies will be swallowed up by life. ⁵ God himself has prepared us for this, and as a guarantee he has given us his Holy Spirit.

⁶ So we are always confident, even though we know that as long as we live in these bodies we are not at home with the Lord. ⁷ For we live by believing and not by seeing. ⁸ Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord. ⁹ So whether we are here in this body or away from this body, our goal is to please him. ¹⁰ For we must all stand before Christ to be judged. We will each receive whatever we deserve for the good or evil we have done in this earthly body."